I Turned Around My Wrong Viewpoint “Knowledge Can Change Your Fate”
By Xingwu
I was born into a poor family and still lived a poor life after getting married. Later, my husband and I both believed in the Lord Jesus and we felt like we had something to lean on. However, I still longed to live a good life, so I strived hard to make money.
My husband and I sell bamboo stems and brooms. We worked hard all year round but could barely make ends meet, while my business colleagues had built new houses and some even had bought cars. Seeing this, I felt confused: “We engage in the same business. Why is it that they can make a lot of money while I can’t?” One time, when I went to sell the bamboo stems with several business colleagues, I saw them put several big stones into the trucks, so that the trucks would weigh more; when doing business with the buyers who didn’t weigh the goods, they would exaggerate the weight of the goods by hundreds of kilograms. In this way, they made twice as much money as I did. Only then did I come to know that they made money by playing tricks. I thought, “If I play the same tricks, I can make a lot of money as well. But I’m a believer in the Lord; the Lord Jesus said, ‘But let your communication be, Yes, yes; No, no: for whatever is more than these comes of evil’ (Matthew 5:37). The Lord hates me playing tricks to deceive others.” At this thought, I felt a little scared and knew I shouldn’t go against my conscience for the sake of ill-gotten gains. After a struggle, I chose to conduct myself as an honest person and play my part as I did my business.
One day, when a business colleague saw us directly weigh our truck on the weighbridge, he said, “You’re so silly! Why don’t you do business with the tradesmen who don’t have weighbridges? They just make a rough estimate of the weight of the goods, and you can exaggerate the weight and make more money. As the saying goes, ‘Doesn’t matter if the cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice,’ and ‘The bold die of gluttony; the timid die of starvation.’ Only by playing tricks can you make more money and live a good life.” The following days, I kept pondering his words over in my mind and thought: “They make big money by playing tricks and live a good life. If I continue to do business honestly, when can I live a better life? As the saying goes, ‘Money makes the world go round.’ Who doesn’t like money?” At that time, I recalled what my pastor said: “If we sin, as long as we confess and repent before the Lord, He will forgive us.” Therefore, my moral resolve was a little shaken.
Not long after, when I was selling the bamboo stems to a tradesman, he said to me: “I’m in a hurry to deliver the goods. There’s no weighbridge here. Since you’ve weighed the goods at home, just tell me the number.” Seeing that he was in a hurry to leave, I thought this was an opportunity to lie about the weight, but it hit me that this was at odds with the Lord’s will. Just as I was hesitating, I thought of my friend’s words, so I exaggerated the weight by two hundred kilograms. Then the tradesman said: “It’s our first deal. If you are honest, I will buy your goods again.” When I heard this, my heart was pounding. I thought: “He trusts me but I lied to him. If he discovers it, how should I face him?” But then I had second thoughts: “Even if I don’t deceive him, others will.” So I didn’t feel self-blame anymore but took cheating for granted. To make him believe me, I said: “Gain got by a lie will burn one’s fingers, so I never tell lies.” Hearing what I said, he believed me. The following days, I always felt uneasy in my heart because I did something unconscionable, but I constantly comforted myself: “This is the last time I cheat someone and I won’t do it again.” However, every time I looked down at the money in my hands that I had earned so easily, I couldn’t help but go against my conscience to play tricks when doing business. Though I made more money, I lived in depression and guilt every day, because I couldn’t follow the Lord’s way but played tricks to deceive Him and offend Him. “If I keep going this way, will God still save me?” Upon thinking of this, I felt very scared and lived in fear all day.
One day, a brother came to my home and solicitously asked us about our conditions. I sighed and said, “We are unable to practice the Lord’s words and live in the state of sinning in the day and confessing at night. We feel very tired and pained. What will our end be if we go on like this?” Hearing my words, the brother said with a smile, “Your state is the same as that of most of the brothers and sisters. If we want to escape the bondage of sin, only relying on the Lord Jesus’ salvation is not enough. Let’s read some of God’s words. God’s words say: ‘For all that man may have been redeemed and forgiven of his sins, it can only be considered as God not remembering the transgressions of man and not treating man in accordance with his transgressions. However, when man, who lives in a body of flesh, has not been set free from sin, he can only continue to sin, endlessly revealing his corrupt satanic disposition. This is the life that man leads, an endless cycle of sinning and being forgiven. The majority of mankind sin in the day only to confess in the evening. This way, even though the sin offering is forever effective for man, it will not be able to save man from sin. Only half the work of salvation has been completed, for man still has a corrupt disposition.’ ‘Though Jesus did much work among man, He only completed the redemption of all mankind and became man’s sin offering; He did not rid man of all his corrupt disposition.’ From God’s words we know this: In the Age of Grace, the Lord Jesus did the work of redemption. As long as we came before the Lord, confessed and repented, He would pardon our sins. But this could only be considered as God not remembering our transgressions. As the sinful nature inside us still remains, we often involuntarily commit sins, such as telling lies, deceiving others, hungering for money and following the evil trends of the world, and so on. The reason why we live in this situation is that the Lord Jesus only did the work of redemption, but not the work of eliminating sin. That is to say, the work of redemption cannot completely resolve the root causes of our sins and rescue us from sin. Then, how can we break free from the bondage of sin? Let’s read another passage of God’s words: ‘By means of this work of judgment and chastisement, man will fully come to know the filthy and corrupt essence within his own self, and he will be able to change completely and become clean. Only in this way can man become worthy to return before the throne of God. All the work done this day is so that man can be made clean and be changed; through judgment and chastisement by the word, as well as through refinement, man can purge away his corruption and be made pure. Rather than deeming this stage of work to be that of salvation, it would be more apt to say it is the work of purification. In truth, this stage is that of conquest as well as the second stage in the work of salvation.’ In the last days, God has done one step of work of judging and cleansing people based on mankind’s needs, and has expressed millions of words to expose man’s various corrupt dispositions, from which we can see clearly our satanic nature such as greediness, slyness, arrogance and self-righteousness, so that we can truly despise ourselves, and then have the will to seek the truth, pursue to purge away these corrupt dispositions, and live out the likeness of a true man. Only then will we get salvation.”
From God’s words and the brother’s fellowship, I understood why I was constantly living in the state of committing sins and confessing. It turned out that the work of the Lord Jesus is that of redemption, not of completely ridding us of sin and cleansing us. So I was still controlled by greedy, selfish and treacherous nature. Enticed by money, I often involuntarily told lies to deceive others when doing business, though I knew this was at odds with the Lord’s will. I betrayed the Lord’s words and lived by satanic disposition, completely losing the likeness of a Christian. It seemed that only if I accepted God’s work of judgment and purification could I escape from the bondage of sin. Therefore, I gladly accepted God’s work in the last days.
One day, I saw God’s words saying: “Honesty means giving your heart to God, being genuine with God in all things, being open with Him in all things, never hiding the facts, not trying to deceive those above and below you, and not doing things only to curry favor with God. In short, to be honest is to be pure in your actions and words, and to deceive neither God nor man.” From God’s words I knew this: God likes honest people. He asks all of us to speak honestly, accept His observation in everything, and not to deceive Him or people; we should seek truth from facts and tell it like it is. After knowing God’s will, I determined to practice being an honest person according to God’s words. However, under the urge to make a profit, I still involuntarily played tricks.
One time my husband took delivery of many defective brooms due to his carelessness. Seeing this, I mulled it over: “They certainly won’t sell; moreover, I’m a believer in God. I must accept God’s inspections and no longer go against the truth doing deceptive things to sadden God.” Then, I picked out the defective brooms and started to process them. But as there were too many defective brooms, I had a second thought: “If I continue doing so, it will be a bad trade for me. I might as well directly sell these brooms. Besides, it is others cheating me first, not me deliberately engaging in deception, so it shouldn’t be considered a trick.” After a struggle, to not suffer losses, I put one or two defective brooms into each bundle of good ones so that I could bluff my way through. Then I sold the brooms to the buyer Mr. Zhou. After that, I was always uneasy in my heart, fearing that he would find out the truth and settle with me.
One day, my phone rang. Upon seeing it was Mr. Zhou calling, I got flurried. The phone keeping ringing, I despondently picked it up and heard him saying, “After I delivered the brooms you sold me to a buyer, he said there are some defective ones, so he refused to pay me. Did you sell me the defective products?” When I heard this, my heart pounded. “I’m done for. He found it. But I can’t tell him the truth; otherwise, it goes without saying that we will have to pay compensation and compromise ourselves, and he will probably stop doing business with us.” Thus, I pretended to be calm, saying, “Mr. Zhou, is it possible that you are mistaken? The goods I’ve sold you always measure up, don’t they?” After saying this, I felt very uncomfortable. For the sake of my profits, I put God’s words to the back of my mind and told lies again. The following days, my mind was preoccupied and I often felt an inexpressible fear and uneasiness. In pain, I kneeled to the ground and prayed to God, “O God! I deceived You for the sake of my profit again. Now I’ve fallen into darkness and feel so pained. O God! I’m too deeply corrupted by Satan. Please save me from Satan’s affliction and allow me to live before You. Please enlighten me and enable me to understand Your will.” After prayer, my heart calmed down. Then I read in the word of God where it says: “Are your goals and intentions made with Me in mind? Are all your words and actions said and done in My presence? I examine all of your thoughts and ideas. Do you not feel guilty? You put on a false front for others to see and you calmly assume an air of self-righteousness; you do this to shield yourself. You do this to conceal your evil, and you even think up ways to push that evil onto someone else. What treachery dwells in your heart!” “You are in the same circumstances as I, yet you are covered with filth; you do not even contain the smallest bit of the original likeness of the humans who were created in the beginning. Moreover, because every day you imitate the likenesses of those unclean spirits, doing what they do and saying what they say, all parts of you—even your tongues and lips—are soaked in their foul water, to the point that you are entirely covered with such stains, and not a single part of you can be used for My work. It is so heartbreaking!”
God’s words were like a double-edged sword that cut through into my heart. I felt pained and had no choice but to self-reflect: Why couldn’t I practice the truth despite being fully aware of it? It turned out that I accepted Satan’s rules of living, such as “Money isn’t everything, but without it, you can do nothing,” “Doesn’t matter if the cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice,” and so on. These thoughts were deeply rooted within my heart and had become my life. For the sake of money and interests, although I knew God is the truth and the source of all positive things, I couldn’t follow His demands. I recalled how I was restricted by the Lord’s words in the beginning, how I gradually lost my conscience, and how I racked my brains to do treacherous things and cheat others, and even thought it was a great ability and skill. As a slave to money and profit, I buried my conscience and lost my integrity. To save me so that I wouldn’t continue to fall, God arranged for the brother to preach to me His work of the last days, and clearly asked me to be an honest person with His words. However, with profit in front of me, I did things that cheated people and resisted God in spite of myself. God observes us from the bottom of our hearts; how could He allow me to cheat Him? God used the fact to tell me His will: He despises me for being treacherous and telling lies to cheat others. This time, I mixed the defective brooms with the good ones and took it for granted because I thought I was cheated by others first; when Mr. Zhou asked me, I didn’t admit my wrongdoing but shifted responsibility onto others. I totally lost my integrity and dignity and simply brought shame to God’s name. People didn’t know what I had done, while God observed my behaviors. As a result, I lost God’s guidance and lived in darkness and panic all day long. This was God’s warning and discipline, from which I truly experienced that God’s righteous disposition will not allow any offense. If I remained unrepentant and continued to play tricks to deceive others, I would ultimately be forsaken by God and be devoured by Satan, losing the opportunity for God’s salvation. At that moment, I developed genuine loathing for myself and came before God, praying, “Oh God! I am wrong. I don’t want to hatch schemes to cheat people anymore. I’m willing to practice being an honest person in accordance with Your words.”
Subsequently, I practiced according to God’s words when doing business and constantly reminded myself not to hatch schemes and hurt God’s heart anymore. Instead of buying brooms from the farmers, I hired workers to make brooms so that all the brooms would measure up. Once, Mr. Zhou came to my workshop. He was very satisfied with the brooms and decided to place regular orders with us. Hearing this, I was very happy. At that time, I recalled those defective brooms I sold him last time, which caused a financial loss for him. I felt self-blame, so I told him, “I’m sorry. Your loss last time was my responsibility, because I mixed one or two defective brooms with the good ones.” Unexpectedly, he didn’t get angry but patted my husband on the shoulder, saying happily, “This is the first time that I’ve ever met honest people like you. I want to make friends with you.” Hearing this, I couldn’t stop thanking God in my heart. I deeply knew this was not because I was a good person but rather because of the outcome of God’s words in me.
Now I practice being an honest person according to God’s words. Surprisingly, my business becomes increasingly brisk. When I took the brooms we made to the market, many tradesmen scrambled to buy our brooms. One tradesman even said, “I’d rather pay a high price for your goods than buy from other sellers for a song, because I don’t trust them. You are honest people; your goods are well made and your price is reasonable, so I only do business with you.” Hearing these words, I was moved and continuously thanked God in my heart. I just practiced a little according to God’s requirements, and to my surprise, I not only gained God’s blessing in business but also won people’s trust.
Afterward, I read God’s words: “Because the essence of God is holy, that means that only through God can you walk through life on the righteous path of light; only through God can you know the meaning of life; only through God can you live out real humanity and both possess and know the truth. Only through God can you obtain life from the truth. Only God Himself can help you shun evil and deliver you from the harm and control of Satan. Besides God, no one and nothing can save you from the sea of suffering so that you suffer no longer. This is determined by the essence of God.” Yes. Only God can save me from Satan’s hands and completely free me from Satan’s affliction, so that I could no longer live according to Satan’s laws such as “Money isn’t everything, but without it, you can do nothing,” “Doesn’t matter if the cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice.” It was God that awakened my conscience and helped me restore my humanity. Now I know this: Only if I pursue being an honest person can I walk onto the right path of life; only if I live by God’s words, can I feel no more guilt in my conscience, live with integrity and dignity and win others’ trust, and can my path ahead become brighter and brighter.
Through experiencing God’s chastisement and judgment, I have turned my viewpoint around and tasted the happiness of being an honest person. Nowadays, I often read God’s words with my brothers and sisters, living a normal church life; meanwhile I am performing the duty of a created being in the church. It is God’s words that have led me to where I am today and allowed me to walk on the bright path of life and live out a valuable and meaningful life. All the glory be to God.